Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Standing at the Seashore
feeling the empty

My head is concrete with the knowledge:
my son is gone -
a long six feet out of reach.

But inside my chest,
it's like standing in the ocean.
When I'm still,
the waves steal the sand
and force me to shuffle,
regain my balance,
remind myself,
lose him all over again.

when I have sunk into disremembrance,
he's still here, and my breath catches
somewhere around my belly button
and waits to meet my heart
as it falls backwards into realization.

He is in everything,
everything but his crib and my arms,
and they ache
with the acceptance of
beauty and emptiness.

I close my eyes, and count
the rises of his chest, forgetting
he's gone, remembering
the warmth that reality stole.

All that's left is
the empty.

, , ,

posted by Erin @ 12:52 PM   0 comments

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Donovan "Nova" LeClair

Monroe, North Carolina
Nova was our second child to be born with congenital heart defects. We lost our daughter at 12 days after open heart surgery in 2001. Nova was born 12/2/05, with Pulmonary Atresia with VSD. He lived 6 weeks after surgery, and passed away on April 6th, 2006. This blog is his story, and the on-going story of how our family is dealing with the loss of our beautiful boy.
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